Recently I have been saying – I never got a C in college- sneering it actually. Not ever a B minus, not ever a B. I said. I was sneering behind the back of the college students in the classes I was teaching. The ones that I didn’t think applied themselves. I would sneer for a moment and then be understanding, speculating
– maybe they had other obligations, maybe they just didn’t have the time. But I would always go back to sneering in a I’m-better-than-them attitude. Then I got my transcripts in the mail to apply for academic jobs. What do you know, there was a C and even a D on my transcript and plenty of B-s and some Bs. Admittedly I went to school over 20 years ago, but I had done some serious memory revision. I ate immediate crow to my boyfriend. It was extra funny to him because he knows how better-than-everyone I can get. He calls it being uppity.
“Look hon, not only do I have a C I have a D on my transcript,” I tell him
“A D?!!!!” He was incredulous.
After all my holier-than-now-ing. I had a D on my transcript.
What the hell happened with that D? Where did that come from? Computer graphics, I remember taking the class. Oh yeah, I remember hating to programming, which was a requirement at the time (it was the late 80s). I refused to program. I made these simple algorithms that produced these pretty but repetitive images. I knew the teacher, one of only two in my Art department. I remember him saying something to me, like, -Was I going to make an effort?-
I as recall I recounted my hatred and difficulty coding and that I wasn’t going to do it. It was very unlike myself not to make the effort. It was the only time I pulled this. But how can I try this memory? When I remembered an utterly different past with no Cs and definitely no Ds.
Ironically, I have a part-time job doing web coding. Something I have done to supplement my living since about 1995.
My son has the habit of remembering things entirely different than how I did. He will tell me about the crazy adventures he thought he had. I’ll tell him, -No honey that never happened but how the hell do I know?- My memory track record is a serious doubt. I hope I learned my lesson and stay off that holier-than-now horse I like to be on. Those who don’t really remember their grades shouldn’t talk shit.